I Didn’t Put the Baby in There

One of my best friends is growing a baby and I am so proud. I don’t know exactly why I’m proud. She’s not done much yet except lie on a table a couple of times and buy some new bras. All the magic is going on inside her while she gets on with normal things…

The Only Dear Dad in 13 Years

Dear Dad, I haven’t written to you since about 1999. I suspect this is largely to do with the fact you have been dead since 2003 and I don’t know if dead people can read. I have written lots of things about you, plays, columns, a book, countless dreary thoughts while drunk on trains. All…